


Taehyung's Journey Through Writing Fanfiction

by Gabiz23



Series: Learn how to love [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst, Based on a song, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Jeon Jungkook is a Sweetheart, Kim Taehyung | V & Park Jimin are Best Friends, M/M, Someone Please Help Jungkook, Song Lyrics, Taehyung writes Haikyuu fanfiction, but not it the main story, there is a fic inside the fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:21:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24794563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gabiz23/pseuds/Gabiz23
Summary: It had come to him like a dream, he was in the middle of class taking notes when he saw it (Jimin always said it was weird that he saw the stories he wanted to write, like, actual pictures); Kenma was in the middle of a crowd, Kuroo on stage looking shocked.He instantly knew hehad towrite it.Taehyung is a Fic writer who is struggling with a particular subject: romantic feelings. So what is a better way to deal with it than asking his roommate, best friend and moral support boy, Jungkook to fake date him. It's not like he doesn't know how it ends.
Relationships: Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V, Kim Seokjin | Jin/Min Yoongi | Suga/Park Jimin, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Series: Learn how to love [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1793347
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All song lyrics belong to Conan Gray.

**Kid Krow - The Story (Chapter 1)**

_  
Kuroo can feel the crowd's eyes on him, the stage lights almost blinding him.  
There is sweat running down his face and his fingers hurt from strumming the guitar for too long, he discarded the guitar picks a long time ago. He probably will have to bandage his fingers after this show. _

_Yaku is jumping beside him, bass in hand. He is so small but feels so big, his presence makes you stop and stare, it demands respect. Lev hits the last notes of the song and the crowd goes insane._

_Kuroo breathes hard into the mic, he wipes the sweat running down his face. Shibayama comes running to the stage carrying his acoustic guitar._

_“So that is it” he thinks “it’s over”._

_“This is our last song for the night.” Kai says into the mic, It’s a new song; a little slower than we are used to, Hope you like it. “_

_Kai nods at Kuroo and he starts playing._

_“ Let me tell you a story  
About a boy and a girl  
It's kinda short, kinda boring “ _

_He can picture it, he can see it all. He remembers writing it on a specially bad day, hiding in his bunk, Kai had told the other to not bother him, leave him be. He doesn’t choke now that he is singing to the public.  
They are doing well for a song they didn’t rehearse, Kuroo refused. Yaku was the one who put it on the set list, and said it was better to get it over with. _

_Just one night, he had said, give yourself just one night._

_“ And when I was younger  
I knew a boy and a boy  
Best friends with each other  
But always wished they were more  
'Cause they loved one other  
But never discovered  
'Cause they were too afraid  
Of what they'd say”  
He looks at the people in front of him, some of them have lighters and their phones flashlights on, it’s not the kind of song they usually play. He is glad they are enjoying it as if every word he spoke didn’t cut his heart into pieces. _

_“Oh, and I'm afraid that's just the way the world works  
It ain't funny, it ain't pretty, it ain't sweet “_

_He sees him, at first he thinks he is dreaming, or his eyes are deceiving him - wouldn’t be the first time, he swears he sees him every show they do- he looks again and for the first time the face doesn’t change._

_Kenma is there, his hair is longer, less blonde than he remembers. He is there and he..._

__

And he.. And he…

Taehyung groans, closing the laptop. He had been stuck on that scene for hours now, his eyes burned from looking at the screen for too long. It wasn’t unusual for him to get writer's block, hell, he got it everytime, just not in the middle of a scene. A scene he had wanted to write for weeks now. 

It had come to him like a dream, he was in the middle of class taking notes when he saw it (Jimin always said it was weird that he saw the stories he wanted to write, like, actual pictures); Kenma was in the middle of a crowd, Kuroo on stage looking shocked.  
He instantly knew he _had to_ write it. 

From the kitchen he can hear Jungkook moving around, the sound of pots and boiling water. Shit, it was his turn to make dinner. 

“You good there?” Jungkook asks, the apartment is small enough that he doesn’t have to scream for Taehyung to hear him from the other room.

“No” His voice comes out muffled, when had he covered his face with a cushion? 

“Stuck on a scene again?” Jungkook runs his hands through Taehyung’s hair, like he always did when the other was stressed. 

You see, Jungkook was Taehyung’s second favorite reader (Jimin will always be the first), he even beta read for him, sometimes. But mostly, he was Taehyung’s confort boy, he was always just there, Taehyung didn’t have to say anything, Jungkook just got it. 

Jungkook sat beside him on their small couch, opening Taehyung’s laptop, he knew the password by now (Jimin’s birthday). Taehyung was still hiding his face in the cushion but he knew Jungkook was reading it from the little noises he was making. 

“So, no dragon slaying or werewolves this time”   
Taehyung groaned, again, and threw the cushion on Jungkook’s face. 

“It came to me, okay?!” It was true, Taehyung writes a lot of fantasy stories, even if not explicitly, there was always a hint of magic. “I was in class and he just showed up.”

Jungkook hums, eyes still scanning the words on the screen. “Who was it this time?”

“Kenma, it was this scene.”

Jungkook looks from the computer to Taehyung, it was really weird, he usually wrote the scenes that showed up to him in a blink of an eye, hands not leaving the keyboard. Once he wrote a 10k fic on a sitting, Jungkook had to physically take him out of his room.   
But Taehyung not being able to finish one of his visions was really, really strange. 

“Hm, maybe something is missing, did you describe Kenma’s scent?”  
Taehyung shakes his head on a no. “It’s not A/B/O.”

“Do you know where you want the story to go?” He is scrolling up and down as if the words would magically come to him if he did.

“Kinda. I know it’s going to be sad.” Taehyung liked sad stories, mostly unrequited love that in the end turned out to be very much required, he wrote some major character death himself but didn’t enjoy it very much. 

“Ok, explain the plot to me, maybe it will help you get things straight.”

Taehyung took a long breath. “So you know Conan Grey’s new album, right?! It’s a masterpiece and I couldn't stop listening to it for weeks, so when Kenma showed up to me I knew I had to mix things together. So the plot is heavily based on the album.” He looked at Jungkook to see if the boy was getting it; Jungkook’s eyes were on him. “The plot goes like this: Kenma and Kuroo are childhood friends and Kenma is totally in love with him from day one but before they fall in love …”  
“There always is a but.”   
“ Before they fall in Kuroo is kind of a jerk and they have huge fights, but also soft moments because they actually love each other just… some bad circumstances.   
I don’t want to justify his bad actions, I know what he does is bad, I just want people to get why he does it, not exactly forgive him. Also it isn’t in chronological order so it starts at the end.”

Jungkook looks at him like he grew another head (Taehyung slowly reaches for his head, just to make sure), he thinks Jungkook is going to say it’s crazy, too complex and it’s going to drive Tae mad- it already is. 

Jungkook scratches his own head. “Maybe you could describe his eyes, it seems they haven’t seen each other for a long time, you could say ‘ Kenma’s eyes shined like…”  
“Two big gemstones and Kuroo was astonished, we did it last time.”  
“We did?” Jungkook asked.   
“Yes, he was slaying a dragon.”   
“Ah.” 

Taehyung groaned, throwing himself back in the coach and groaning again, this time in pain. The cushions weren’t very soft, not after he, Hoseok and Jimin had a jumping competition on them.

Jungkook went back to the kitchen and Taehyung followed, dragging his feet. On the fridge was a drawing of the seven of them Jungkook made once, all of them looking magic, RPG style.Jimin is a fairy, Yoongi a witch, Joon is holding a book that seems to shine, Hobi is an elf with a bow and arrow, Jin is wearing a royal suit, a prince, Jungkook and Taehyung are wearing matching armors, dragon slaying knites. Taehyung wasn’t the only one obsessed with magic in this house.

“So sad and no magic. Very different from your original style, why the sudden change?” Taehyung sat on the counter and Jungkook came to rest between his thighs, elbows digging on him, but it didn’t hurt, it was good weight.

“Me and Jimin talked about it, changing styles for a while. He promised we would write something that didn’t have Bakugou losing an arm or Kirishima with super long hair on it.” 

“And you came up with a sad band au?”  
“It wasn’t me, it was Kenma.” 

Jungkook laughed, his elbows digging harder on the meat of Taehyung’s legs.   
“Right, Kenma came to you and told you to write a sad band au where he and his best friend slash boyfriend, maybe, hadn’t talked for a long time and now Kenma is at one of his shows and Kuroo is speechless.”   
“Exactly.” 

Jungkook hummed again, with his face pressed against Taehyung’s belly it sounded like a purr. Taehyung stroked his hair.

“Maybe you should write a little about his feelings? Like, how does he feel when he sees his lover after a long while.”

It was a good idea. How would Kuroo feel when seeing Kenma after so long? Would he be happy? sad? Would he throw up from the pressure? It wouldn’t be a fun scene to write. How would _he_ feel?   
Taehyung only had a boyfriend in his first year of college and it lasted one month. He imagined himself in Kuroo’s situation, how would he feel if Minho showed up out of nowhere? Nothing, probably. He didn’t even like him that much, he definitely didn’t _love_ him.   
Taehyung was aware that writing feelings wasn’t his strong point, Jimin and sometimes Yoongi helped him with that, they had a better experience at dealing with their and other people’s feelings than Taehyung had.

Then it clicked. 

He couldn’t write about it because he had never done it, he had never been in love before.

And that’s what he tells Jungkook.

“You have never defeated a devil spirit or killed a god and yet you could write about it just fine.” He is mixing the seasoning with the ramen, it smells good.

“But that’s easy, it’s fiction. No one truly killed a god or anything. But we are talking about normal human emotions, people fall in and out of love everyday! Maybe the reason why I can’t write about it is because I had never experienced it.” 

Jungkook holds a bowl and chopsticks to Taehyung who is still sitting on the counter, but this time Jungkook takes out a chair to sit on. 

“And how do you suggest you experience that? Watch as many romcoms as you can? Interview people on the streets? You could always ask Jimin, he has _two_ boyfriends, after all.”

“It’s not because he got it that he knows how and, the exact problem is because I, Kim Taehyung, hadn’t experienced it, asking people wouldn’t solve it. “

“So, what do you suggest you do?” Jungkook’s mouth is full of food, sauce running down his chin.

“I need to get a boyfriend and then break up with them.” 

Jungkook chokes, his cheeks turning red as tomatoes. Taehyung jumps out of the counter coming up to his friend and hitting his back. Jungkook breathes normal and turns to Taehyung. “I’m sorry, what?”

“I get myself a boyfriend, fall in love and then break up with them.”  
“All of that just because of a fic? I’m sorry, I understand your passion but isn’t it a little crazy? If you fall in love for real, won’t you feel sad after it’s over? “

Taehyung sits on Jungkook’s lap, the hard wood from the counter hurts his legs. Maybe he should put pants on. 

“You’re right, Kookie. I would be devastated.” Taehyung rests his head on top of Jungkook’s, his hair smells like strawberries which meant he had been stealing his shampoo again. 

He thinks about it once again, he tries to picture it in his head. Kuroo on stage, sweat dripping down his face. He pictures Kenma, trying to make himself smaller on the ground, his eyes never leaving Kuroo’s. After all this time the feeling is the same. But what feeling?   
Taehyung tries to picture himself in Kuroo's place, what would he do if he saw someone he loved the most and missed them. Who would it be? Taehyung wouldn’t be so sad over some boy, he would cry yes but his life wouldn’t be over because of it. It had to be someone he would miss deadly, a childhood friend. It couldn’t be Jimin, it’s just not realistic seeing them apart. Then who? Maybe he should ask Jungkook. 

Jungkook. 

“You should date me!” He says jumping from the boy’s lap, making him spill his food on his shirt, thank god he is wearing a black one today. 

“What ?”  
“You should date me! It makes so much sense! We are best friends, we live together, we love each other. It’s perfect!” 

“Taehyung, I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“Listen to me.” He squeezes Jungkook’s cheeks together, shutting him up. When did Taehyung get so close?” “You don’t have to date me for real, we can fake date!”

“Yeah, and we totally don’t know how that thing usually ends.” He pushes Taehyung’s hands away from his face. “I love you but I don’t think this is going to end well.”

“Aww Jungkookie, I love you too! “ Taehyung says, going back to his seat on the coach, turning his laptop on. “Scared you will fall in love with me?”

“Yes.” Jungkook says on his way to his room, he promised Jimin he would finish his commission today and he really needs to get it over with. 

“Don’t worry, you will always be my bestie. Don't tell Jiminie.”

He doesn’t get a response and he is almost glad, his fingers are already working on their own. 

He takes a breath. 

_Kenma is there, his hair is longer, less blonde than he remembers. He is there and Kuroo feels like coming home, he feels like all his worries disappear. He looks at Kenma and he feels like he is falling all over again, the warmth coming out of his body can’t be mistaken by the heat of the lights. Kuroo feels like his whole body is on fire with anticipation, of what, he doesn’t know._

_Yaku looks at him funny, he hadn’t seen Kenma yet and Kuroo doesn’t know how to tell him. All eyes are on him, _his_ eyes are on him._

_“Oh, and I'm afraid that's just the way the world works  
But I think that it could work for you and me  
Just wait and see  
It's not the end of the story” _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was a weird sight, Jimin usually looked like a model but today he just looked like… a normal college kid who had already given up on living.

**Kid Krow - Comfort Crowd / Can we be friends? (Chapter 2)**

_Kenma would always remember it, the moment he saw Kuroo for the first time.  
He was seven, had just moved in, Kuroo was his neighbour and because of their close age their parents decided that it meant that they were instantly friends.   
It kind of worked as from the first sight, Kuroo had decided that Kenma was going to be his friend, no, his best friend. _

_Kenma was too young to understand why his heart beat faster every time his best friend smiled at him. He knew he could love his friends, it was a normal thing, but Kuroo was different he could always be._

_“Hi, my name is Kuroo Tetsuro and I’m 8 years old” He smiled at Kenma with that stupid hair and missing teeth.  
“Kenma” it was all he could say, his whole body shaking.   
“Well Kenma, I can tell we are going to be friends.”_

_Kenma could feel it too.  
_

Jimin sat beside him wearing sunglasses and a hoodie three times bigger than himself, it probably belonged to Jin. It was a weird sight, Jimin usually looked like a model but today he just looked like… a normal college kid who had already given up on living. 

“Not a word.”   
“I didn’t say anything” Taehyung sips from his cup of hot chocolate, he really didn’t get how people liked coffee. Jimin groaned beside him, hitting his head on the table. 

Taehyung focused back on his laptop, three tabs open: His e-mail, google drive and a pinterest page dedicated to Akaashi. (Jungkook might be his real-life moral support boy but Akaashi Keiji will always be his favorite moral support _anime_ boy.) He was actually trying to write an essay this time, it was still fiction but a totally different - and boring- one. 

Jimin raised his head from the table, a red mark on his forehead. “Please, never let me get into a drinking competition with my boyfriends again.”   
“Did you win?” Taehyung doesn't even look at him, if he stops now, only god knows when he will pick it back up.  
“Of course, Yoongi ended up sleeping in the tub.” He laughs while taking out his notebook. Jimin always liked to write on paper, different from Taehyung who always carried his computer around.   
He flipped a page, the lines were empty but the sides were filled with little notes and doodles. Taehyung caught a sight of “Kiri owns 10 dogs” and a drawing that looked closely like a mix of Jin and an alpaca. 

The professor arrived, eyes dead. He used to be a writer, a good one, Taehyung had read one or two of his books. He doesn’t know why he stopped, he never said anything about it, he never spoke about anything other than writing styles and how he would kill himself if he read something that resembled twilight again. 

(Taehyung did it once, a retelling of the story if Bella got with Alice instead.)   
(Jimin did it twice.)

“How is your project doing?” Jimin asked.   
“Good, almost done. How about you?” _Kenma ran to his house as fast as his legs could carry him, running away from the boy that made him feel things._  
“It’s going, Jinnie helped me a little and by help I mean he said as many pick up lines he could remember until I threw my whole pencil case at him. His character is now a jerk.” Oh right, Jimin was writing about another version of them. _He could see the light coming out of Kuroo’s room and he wondered if his parents wouldn’t come and scold him for letting it on. His parents always did._

Jimin looked at his notebook, taking his glasses off his face, the dark circles giving him a maniac kind of look.”That’s not your project.”  
“No, I’m working on a new fic, Kenma showed up to me.”   
“Looks interesting, change that.” He pointed at the screen. That’s why Tae liked when Jimin read his stories, he knew Taehyung like no one else, he knew how his mind worked. Sometimes he would just change things up and Taehyung wouldn’t notice. His and Jimin’s ideas walked hand in hand. 

“It sounds dark, like not dark dark but dark like a cloudy day that you spend the whole day waiting for rain.” Jimin had never used the word dark so many times before, and he had a goth boyfriend. “It feels like the calm before the storm.”

Taehyung stopped, thinking about it. 

The calm before the storm. 

Uhm.

It’s the end of the class when Jungkook shows up. His hair is a mess and it looks wet from sweat, it’s gross and Taehyung can't wait to run his hands through it. 

He is carrying two cups from the campus cafeteria, it’s not the good one but he knows his payment hasn't arrived yet. It's still sweet that he brought them coffee.

“For my two favorite writers.” He says handing them their perspective cups. Jimin says thanks and drinks it instantly.   
Jungkook makes a face and looks at Taehyung who just stares at him. They maintain eye contact for a second and he can see the blush rising on Jungkook’s cheeks. 

Oh he forgot. 

“Thank you, Boyfriend.” 

Jimin spits is coffee off, Jungkook almost falls from his chair. 

“I thought you were kidding when you said you two were fake dating.” Jimin screams, making a few people look at them. Jungkook tries to hide his face with the hood of his hoodie (It’s not even his hoodie, it’s Namjoon’s. Jungkook likes to steal his clothes.)

“ _I_ thought he was kidding.” Jungkook said. 

“Of course I wasn’t! I told you, I need to get this whole feeling thing perfectly.” Taehyung sips from his cup, he doesn’t know what it is but tastes like strawberries. 

“Taehyung, you read fanfiction, you _write_ fanfiction. You know what happens when people fake date.”   
“They fall in love, I know. Would that be too bad?” 

Jimin and Jungkook share a look. 

“Okay, I will leave you two lovebirds alone. I have two hot boyfriends to take care of.” He throws his cup on a garbage can, how did he drink that so fast? “See you guys later, call me if he starts acting up.”  
“Okay!” Taehyung says happily, sipping on his strawberry- whatever.  
“I was talking to Jungkook.”  
“Mean.”  
“I love you.” 

When Jimin is too far away to hear them, Taehyung turns to Jungkook and gives him one of his wicked smiles.

“Oh no. I don’t like that smile, actually I do, I like all your smiles but this one means trouble.” Taehyung’s smile only gets bigger.  
“So boyfriend.” Jungkook moans in pain.” Where are we going?”  
“Home?” 

Taehyung holds Jungkook’s hand, it’s sweaty and hot. Seriously, what is wrong with him today?

“How about a date? You can take me to that nice coffee shop that just opened.”  
“I just bought you coffee and none of us has money.”

He is right, Taehyung hates when Jungkook is right. (Which is most of the time, Taehyung has a lot of stupid ideas.) (Like when he tried to convince Namjoon that Hoseok was the one that put the gigantic cutout of Harry Styles (Take me home era) in his room.) (It was Taehyung _and_ Hoseok ) (Namjoon still has it).

“We could re-watch Given if you want to.” Jungkook offers, adjusting his hands so their fingers are interlocked. They are used to holding hands, they hold hands all the time in fact. But it feels different, maybe it’s the title hanging above their heads. _Boyfriend_. They weren’t even real boyfriends and it still changed things.   
He likes the way Jungkook is looking at him, not very different from the way he looked at him yesterday or the day before. It’s the same but it’s different.

“Okay.” Taehyung says happilly. He can’t wait to cry his eyes out.  
“Okay.”

“Don’t Augustus Waters me”

“Okay.”

Taehyung kicks his ass.

_Kuroo liked the eyes on him.  
The crowd couldn’t keep their eyes off of him. Wishing, desiring him. Wanting to know what he tasted like.   
He felt like a god. _

_Kenma was sitting on the bar, the coke Kuroo had ordered for him before he had to go to stage was still sitting on the counter, he barely touched it. His eyes were focused on his phone, eyes moving side to side, fast fingers running on the keyboard._

_“Look at me.” Kuroo wanted to scream. “Look at me.”_

_Yaku jumped from one of the big speakers around the stage, the crowd went crazy. Kenma looked up, eyes wide open._

_Kuroo smiled, a girl in front of the stage raised her shirt up to her breasts, Kuroo didn’t even take a second look, not when Kenma was looking at him._

_“I just needed company now  
Yeah, I just needed someone around  
Yeah, I don't care what song that we play  
Or mess that we make  
Just company now  
Comfort crowd” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!!!  
> What are you guys thinking so far??? What do you think will happen in the future?? I love hearing from you! 
> 
> Find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/mooncatyoongi)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We should go to a party.” Jimin repeats. “When was the last time we got the whole gang together to just party and relax.”   
> “You say gang like we are Scooby-doo characters”

**Kid Krow - Wish You Were Sober (chapter 3)**

_Kenma didn’t like parties, and yet there he was, in another party he wasn’t invited to but still went because Kuroo said he should. “You will go to a lot of parties when you get to college” he said, ha, as if.  
(When he was alone in his room, he liked to imagine that Kuroo would go to college too. Maybe they would share a dorm, have some classes together. He could only dream.)_

_Kenma is sitting on the coach, his cup is still full, he didn’t drink anything out of it. Just the smell made him want to throw up.  
The song playing was one he knew, he hummed under his breath, trying to make himself smaller than he already was. _

_Kuroo was across the room, arm around some girl he didn’t know and doubted Kuroo did, they were sharing the same cup. Bokuto was with them, his own arm around Akaashi who looked at Kenma with an “I’m sorry” expression._

_Me too,he wanted to say._

__

There were times Taehyung felt like suffocating on words; his lungs filled with so many things he wanted to write that he just couldn’t.   
He knows every line, every paragraph, he knows what he wants to do with the power he has, but sometimes he just can’t.   
There were times where he felt that writing was his only way out, out of his life, out of his boring self. He could be whoever he wanted, whatever he wanted. He could kill dragons and be a mage. He could be a prince or a flower shop owner. He could change his hair and clothes and name. He could be anyone but himself.

Writing fanfiction was easy for him, he didn’t have to create the characters, he just had to mold them to fit on the scenery he created. So why the hell was his writing assignment kicking his ass?!  
The prompt wasn’t very difficult: create a new version of yourself. Easy. Taehyung does it all the time. He does it for fun. And yet here he is, empty handed.

He closes the computer and pushes his chair away.

Jimin is sitting on Taehyung’s bed, orange hair a mess from running his hand through it. Jungkook is beside him, round glasses slipping from him nose, he has his drawing pad with him. Taehyung is sitting on his chair, casually spinning every minute. 

“We should go to a party.” Jimin says, the book on his lap now closed.   
“We should study.” Jungkook says, eyes lot leaving his drawing.   
Jimin rolls his eyes “You are not studying, you’re drawing Taehyung.”

Taehyung’s eyes lighten up and without having to say a word Jungkook moves his pad so Taehyung can see. It’s clearly him, just more cartoon-y, bigger eyes and lashes. Taehyung gives him a thumbs up and keeps on turning with his chair. 

“We should go to a party.” Jimin repeats. “When was the last time we got the whole gang together to just party and relax.”   
“You say gang like we are Scooby-doo characters” Jungkook says, he is looking at Jimin now, analyzing his features as if he hadn’t drawn him more times than he can count.   
“Don’t change topics! I know for a fact that Jin doesn’t have anything to do today, he just has to bat his eyelashes and Yoongi will do anything he wants. Hobi’s dance practice was cancelled so he is up to some dancing. You,“ he points at Jungkook with his pen, “can ask Namjoon, he can’t say no to Jungkook.” 

Jungkook looks at Taehyung as if asking for help. Taehyung gives him a smile.

“Yeah, I could like some dancing. And alcohol, lots of alcohol.” 

Jungkook groans from Taehyung's betrayal. 

“Fine, I will ask Joonie, you two go get ready. Jimin takes fucking ages to get pretty for his boyfriends.”   
“Jokes on you my boyfriends always think I’m pretty.” Jimin sticks his tongue out. 

Jungkook gets up from the bed with a moan of annoyance. Taehyung knows he is not really mad, he just likes to pretend because he is a brat. Jimin gets up too and goes straight to Taehyung’s closet, searching for something. 

“My clothes are too big for you, I thought you wanted to look pretty for your boyfriends.”

“Oh please, I could wear a potato sack and Yoongi would get a boner; I’m looking for something for you to look pretty for your boyfriend.”   
Taehyung hates that he can feel his cheeks burn, and the look on Jimin’s face tells him his best friend noticed that too.   
“I don’t need to dress up for Jungkook, we live together, he literally sees me everyday. And also, it’s not real.”

Jimin rolls his eyes and turns back to his mission to find Taehyung some decent clothes that don’t have holes in them or that should have been washed a month ago. “Maybe that’s why you can’t finish writing it.”  
“How do you know?” Taehyung is still spinning on his chair.  
“You shared your Google Docs with me, I opened it yesterday to see if you needed any help. And you do because it has been almost two weeks since you last updated and you haven’t written a single page yet.”   
“And you think it has something to do with my situation with Jungkook?” He holds onto his desk to stop the chair, his head is a little dizzy and he sees two Jimin’s. What a nightmare.

“I _know_ it. I mean, that’s the whole point you’re doing the fake-dating thing, so you can write your fic and yet you can’t and I think it’s because you are constantly reminding yourself that it isn’t real.”  
“So you want me to date Jungkook for real? That's stupid.”   
“You are stupid.” He throws a sock at Taehyung’s face. “yes and no. Not date date but like fake date him more. You guys haven’t changed the way you treat each other since you started this nonsense.”

Taehyung hated that his friend was right. Things with Jungkook remained the same ever since this thing started. Not that things were bad, no they were great, but not the idea of romance Taehyung had.  
He imagined that when he fell in love he would know, he imagined how they would meet and how they would confess their love to each other. His relation with Jungkook was nowhere near that. 

“And how do you suggest I change things ?”  
Jimin gives him one of his cheeky grimes.  
“You could start by changing that shirt.”

Sober Taehyung wasn’t a big fun of clubs, but drunk Taehyung? He loved them.   
He was squished between two people he didn’t know, his friends were somewhere he couldn’t see and he was having the time of his life. 

The boy behind him grabbed his waist, the girl in front of him couldn’t stop smiling and he smiled back. He didn’t know the song that was playing but if he did he would say it was the soundtrack of his life. (He said the same thing about the other five before that.)

When the boy behind him started to get too handy Taehyung knew it was time for him to go look for Jimin who probably was either 1) getting super drunk, 2) making out with one or both of his boyfriends or 3) dance machine mode. Taehyung’s favorite was possibility 3, it was amazing watching the way his friends moved, if he could he would pay Jimin just to dance for him.

“Hey, we were looking for you.”   
Taehyung turn his head to look at Namjoon. He is wearing a t-shirt and jeans, nothing too fancy but he still looks like a model and Taehyung totally understand Jungkook’s puppy crush on him.   
“Joonie! I’m having so much fun!” He says putting his arms around Namjoon’s neck who immediately hugs him back. 

See, this is a normal thing on their friend circle, being affectionate with each other, trading cheek kisses and hugs and love. It wasn’t weird, even if some of them dated.   
Speaking of dating.

“Did you see my boyfriend?”  
“You boyf- Oh you mean Jungkook? He is at the bar with Yoongi.”  
“We should go see him! He must miss me.”  
Namjoon laughs, but grants Taehyung's wish by dragging him to where Jungkook is sitting drinking with Yoongi. 

“Jungkookie!” Taehyung throws himself at him, he knows Jungkook will catch him, he always does.  
“You’re more drunk than I expected.” Jungkook smiles at him.

That’s something Taehyung loves about Jungkook, he always smiled at him and never got mad in situations other people would. He doesn’t judge him and simply _gets it_.

Taehyung just stares at him, his big eyes and cute nose, the bunny teeth and his oh so strong arms that Taehyung loves to hold and be held in.   
Jungkook is still looking at him and smiling and even in his drunk state Taehyung can see how much he cares.

“We should dance.”   
“You just came back from dancing.” Yoongi says, he is still sitting on a stool from the bar, he looks happy, his cheeks red from drinking.   
“Jungkookie, come dance with me.”   
“Ok.” 

Taehyung drags him by the hand, he sees Jimin and Hobi sandwiching Jin and smiles. He loves seeing his friends happy.   
When they reach the center of the dance floor Taehyung lets Jungkook’s hand go only to hold him by his tiny, tiny waist. Jungkook doesn’t know where to put his hands and it’s cute how he just lets Taehyung hold him. 

Taehyung puts his head on Jungkook’s shoulder, he always said that he wanted to date someone bigger than him but right now he is thankful that they are almost the same size. He starts to slowly move side to side, bringing Jungkook with him. 

“I don’t think this is how you dance to this kind of song.” Jungkook laughs and his whole body vibrates with it.   
“Shhh, we are slow dancing.” Taehyung doesn’t know when he close his eyes but Jungkook’s body is so warm, so real that he can’t help but let everything go. 

Jungkook laughs again and holds him back. They don’t look even close to slow dancing, they look just like two idiots hugging and moving side to side together. And Taehyung is happy because Jungkook is doing it with him, holding him and just being there, no questions asked. 

Jimin was right, he was holding too much into the fake part when he should have been just enjoying himself. 

Taehyung looks up to see that Jungkook is looking back at him. They don’t say anything when their faces get closer than before, closer than they have ever been. 

When their lips touch and the lights switch from green to purple Taehyung realizes that pretending to be in love with Jungkook is going to easier than he thought. 

_  
He could hear their laughs over the music and he wished he didn’t. He wanted to go home, hide under the covers, play some games or just sleep. Anywhere but here; a place that was just a reminder of how different he and Kuroo were. While his best friend (could he even call him that? After the “Incident” they weren’t acting like friends.) laughs with pretty girls under his arm. Kenma touches his hair and reminds himself why he keeps it so long. _

_“Having fun?” He didn’t see Kuroo approach him, to much into his own head.  
“No” He doesn’t try to lie, Kuroo always knew when he lied. (Or used to, Kenma had been lying a lot. “It doesn’t bother me.” “It’s okay, it doesn't have to mean anything”).  
“Wanna dance?”_

_He didn’t have the chance to answer, Kuroo’s arms where already on his waist, gluing their bodies together, hips to hips, chest to chest.  
Kenma would never get used to it, being this close with Kuroo knowing he was allowed to touch, to have him for himself, even if only for a night._

_Kuroo put Kenma’s hands on his shoulders, he doesn’t know where his cup went and he hopes he didn’t spill it on the couch, he knew he would be back there when Kuroo decided that he had enough of Kenma for tonight._

_Kuroo smiles at him and Kenma’s heart melts just as his legs do when Kuroo smashes their lips together.  
They had done it before, when they were kids and recently when Kuroo decided that Kenma was enough. (It wasn’t like that but in Kenma’s head it was exactly like that)._

_It’s the first time Kuroo kissed Kenma in public, not inside his car, or under the covers, or in dark corners, hiding from the world. At first Kenma thought it was cute, just them, no one had to know.  
Until Kuroo said that exact same words: No one has to know. (Kenma lie number 1: Okay.)_

_The kiss mustn’t had last more than a few seconds but for Kenma it had lasted an eternity, for the first time he didn’t mind the eyes on him, they could watch, Kuroo was his._

_It’s after Kuroo separates their mouths that Kenma tastes the alcohol, some fruit thing mixed with beer, the way Kuroo’s eyes can’t seem to focus, how he leans a little bit to the right when he stands up._

_“I wish you were sober.” He says before rushing out the door.  
_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading!!!  
> I know this update took longer than the other but I had a major writers block but furtunally I got myself out of it!   
> Sooo, what did you think of this Chapter ??? Please tell me.   
> Kudos and Comments are always appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Look, starting things from scratch can be hard,so why don’t you try starting from somewhere you already know? Something you would like to change. Isn’t there anything in your life that you know now that you wished to know back then? ”
> 
> Taehyung thinks about it. When he was 8 he broke his arm by climbing a tree. When he first began College he did all his essays last minute. There also was last night but he didn’t think thats’s what his teacher was talking about.

**Kid Krow - Heather (chapter 4)**

_  
When Kuroo started dating Heather, a pretty girl with a smile that could blind the sun and a soul so beautiful it was hard to look at her (but Kuroo looked at her, he stared,) Kenma saw it coming. How could he not?_

_When he saw her with a familiar sweater, new, red and too big for her frame to be hers, he knew his play pretend was over. The long walks, the clothes sharing. Kurro smiled when he saw her, complimenting her sweater that was obviously his. Kenma watched, eyes burning with tears and rage but mostly jealousy._

_As they walked by, hand in hand, smiling and laughing like the happy couple they were, Kenma got it. All the years pinning and foolishly hoping for Kuroo to love him back flashed before his eyes.  
Looking at him looking at her he realized all the things that made him choose her over him. Every freckle, every string of long, pretty hair, Kenma saw he was not, he got it. Kuroo would never kiss him, tell him he looked pretty in his clothes, walk hand in hand with him. He got it and it hurt more than when he broke his arm, hurt more than when he woke up from a good dream only to realize it was all it was, a dream. _

_Kenma didn’t hope for or wish for things, but god, did he wish for Heather to be dead.  
_

Taehyung woke up on his bed, which is weird since the last thing he remebered was being at that stupid club dancing with Jungkook. He couldn’t remember the details but he remembered the kiss, and god he wished he didn’t.   
It wasn’t the first time he kissed a friend, he had kissed Jimin more times than he could count, he even kissed Hoseok on his first year of college. But it was Jungkook and he was different. 

He groaned throwing his arm over his eyes. Maybe he should call Jimin or Yoongi who was weirdly good at giving love advice. Not that Taehyung needed love advice, he just needed Jungkook-kissing advice. 

There was sound in the kitchen and Taehyung had hoped that Jungkook could have been in class by the time he woke up, now he only had two options: a) he could talk to Jungkook like any normal and thinking individual or b) pretend nothing had happened and continue with his life. (There was also option C that was getting out by the window so Jungkook wouldn’t see him. They lived on the third floor and there was no fire escape staircase, so Taehyung decided that option C was out of choice.)

He chose option B. 

First he looked at himself in the mirror, he was wearing his pajamas which also meant that, not only had Jungkook taken him home but had also changed his clothes, embarrassing. He was also looking for hickeys, he doubted they went that far but checking wouldn’t kill him. He lifted his shirt, looking for any red/purple spot on his body, he didn’t find anything and decided that he was good to go. 

He was ready to sing his usual good morning song when he saw Jungkook, or better, Jungkook’s back. 

It was full of red scratch marks, scratch marks that could have only been made by human hands- Taehyung knew a lot about scratches from animals and that thing was not made by one.   
Jungkook turned, spatula in hand, shirtless, hair a mess and a little sleepy still. Taehyung’s domesticity dream.

“Hey, didn’t see you there. “ He smiled, he had flour on his cheek. So he was making pancakes, Taehyung’s favorite breakfast. Kill. Him. Now.

Taehyung didn’t answer, too busy trying to strangle himself in his mind.

“Did you sleep well?” Jungkook tried again, he started to look the way he did when he thought he did something wrong. Feet turned to each other like an anime school girl and hands fidgeting. Taehyung needed to speak before the poor boy combusted to flames.

“Yeah, I did. How about you? Any back pain?” Taehyung wanted to slap himself as soon as the words left him mouth.   
Jungkook’s cheeks turned bright red, the spatula hitting the floor. Good job Taehyung. 

“Yeah, I mean, I did sleep well. The back is fine.” His voice cracked like a teenage boy. If Taehyung wasn’t so preoccupied that he was going to actually kill Jungkook he would have thought it was cute. 

“Nice.”   
“Nice” 

And both of them walked to the kitchen in silence which was weird since they were always talking and laughing and singing. And then it hit him, what if he was the one who gave Jungkook the scratches. It made sense, they did kiss the other night and that was the last thing he remembered. 

“It wasn’t you.” Jungkook says as if reading his mind. They did this often, talk without actually speaking too.   
Taehyung blinked, he didn’t notice he was staring. Uggh, he was a mess today.   
“It wasn’t you, that did that to my back, I mean. “   
“Oh I know.” He didn’t.  
“You know?”   
“Yeah, I would know if we had … you know. “ He lied, he had no clue.  
“Good, hm, I mean.”

It was awkward. It was never awkward between them and it was making Taehyung feel uneasy. 

“Who was it? “ He asked because he wanted to know so his mind could shut up, but deep inside him he was disappointed it hadn’t been him.   
“Hm, some girl I met after you left.“ After we kissed, he doesn’t say. Good, they are both pretending nothing happened.   
“A girl?” He hated how disgusted his voice sounded. What was wrong with him?  
“Yeah, Taehyung, a girl.“ He says pointing to the bisexual flag that stands beside Taehyung’s own pansexual one on their front door. “Are you okay? Did you have too much to drink?”  
“No, I’m fine.” He lied again, that was twice that day. He needed to get his head straight. 

Jungkook goes back to his pancake making while Taehyung just sits there. It feels like there is an invisible wall between them, a thin layer of things that haven’t been said. Taehyung wanted to reach out, to speak but he just couldn’t, he didn’t know what to say. 

“I’m sorry for yesterday, I know we never really talked about the whole fake dating thing but I feel like I crossed a line and I’m sorry.” That was a good start. 

“It’s okay, you were drunk, we both were. Also I’m sorry too, like you said, we didn’t talk about the whole dating thing…”  
“Fake. Fake dating thing” Taehyung doesn’t know why he says it but he can’t stop himself.   
“Yeah, right. Anyway, Tae I’m sorry I slept with some girl without speaking to you first. I know we are only dating for you to be able to write your fic but still, it didn’t feel right.” 

Taehyung doesn’t answer but he looks at Jungkook. Jungkook, with the big muscles and shirtless, with the flour on his cheek and a bad blush. He looks at Taehyung as if he expects him to scold him for doing something he clearly wanted to do. 

“You don’t have to apologize. We are fine.” Taehyung says trying to sound convincing, he did take some lessons with Jin but he is not a good actor when it really counts. But Jungkook smiles and goes back to his cooking so he thinks that they are OK for now. 

“How did I get home if you were busy being a himbo ?”   
Jungkook laughs, throwing his head back and Taehyung smiles because he likes seeing him happy.   
“I think Hobi and Joon took you, Yoongi passed out on the bar and Jimin and Jin had to carry him back home.” 

Taehyung laughs while Jungkook tells him the whole carrying Yoongi story. Him sitting on a chair while Jungkook makes them breakfast in their small kitchen they share, the sun coming out from the window warming the whole place while Jungkook says something silly and Taehyung laughs with his whole body. It’s a scene that had happened a thousand times before but it feels different somehow; it feels warmer.

“Do you want to do something after your classes? “

“Taehyung, can you stay so we can talk?”   
You never want to hear those hands coming out of a teacher’s mouth, worst when they come from your favorite teacher. It isn’t the first time it happens, they had talked about Taehyug’s works, usually to praise him, but the look he is receiving is the same Jimin received after handing in his third Twilight fanfiction. 

“Yeah, sure.”

He sits on the chair closest to his teacher’s desk, legs crossed. 

“I think you know why I called you here.” He says, his glasses are slipping from his nose but he doesn't push it back. “You are one of my best students, Taehyung. I have seen the things you are capable of doing; when I first assigned this I thought ‘wow, Taehyung will do great at this.’”

Taehungs gulps, he can feel his heart beating in his chest like it did that morning, seeing Jungkook in the kitchen. He can feel his palms sweating, he wants to run and hide.

“Honestly Taehyung, I’m a little disappointed.”

Kill him, kill him now. 

“I can’t see you at all in your writing.”  
“I thought that was kind of the point? A story from another us.”  
“Yes, you’re correct but…” He takes a deep breath. “Changing the settings doesn’t change who you are.”

Taehyung knew it hadn’t been his best work, he took weeks to do something he knew he could have done in one sitting. He didn’t expect to be so bad at it, though.

“Take your friend Jimin, for example. He wrote in a medieval setting and yet I could still recognize Yoongi from the music department or Seokjin from theater. I could still recognize you even if you were portrayed as a dragon.”

Taehyung smiles a little. Jimin really had outdone himself with that one. He spent nights and nights writing and planning. Taehyung had read it before it was done and he couldn’t wait for it to be done because it was that good. 

“In yours, well, the writing was perfect but I couldn’t see you.”

“I’m not trying to make excuses but I really did have a hard time with this one. I always do this, project myself in different settings.” He blushed a little, telling his friends about his fanfics was one thing, telling his college teacher was another. “I just… had a hard time creating something new.”

“How about recreating something you already have?” His teacher says crossing his legs where he is sitting on top of the table, he is that cool.

“Uh?”  
“Look, starting things from scratch can be hard,so why don’t you try starting from somewhere you already know? Something you would like to change. Isn’t there anything in your life that you know now that you wished to know back then? ”

Taehyung thinks about it. When he was 8 he broke his arm by climbing a tree. When he first began College he did all his essays last minute. There also was last night but he didn’t think that's what his teacher was talking about.

“Well, back then I would have liked to know you didn’t like my writing, and I know that now.” He tries to say it as a joke but by the look his teacher is giving him shows that he isn’t convinced. 

He lets out a breath. “Ok Taehyung. You should go, your friend Jungkook is waiting for you.”

Taehyng turns to look at the door and there he is, trying to hide behind it so he won’t disturb the conversation.

“Thanks for your time.” Taehyung says, bowing.   
“You’re welcome.“

Taehyung is half way through the door when his teacher calls again.

“Taehyung, I will give you a second chance to write this essay, only because I believe you can do it and because I think you haven’t realized some things yourself yet.”

“Thank you so much.” He bows again. Running to meet Jungkook. 

“What did he want ? Are you in trouble? “ Jungkook asks taking Taehyung’s bag for him. He always does this, take care of him without him asking. 

“He wanted to talk about an essay, I got a second chance.” He looks at the ground, taking Jungkook’s hand in his. 

‘Hm, that’s good, isn't it?” 

“Yeah, I believe so.”

“So, where do you want to go?.” 

“Anywhere you would take me.”

_  
Kenma didn’t let himself hope for things.   
He didn’t hope for good grades, or that he could grow taller. He didn’t hope for money or even health. He didn’t hope for things because he knew hoping was a stupid thing to do and would only let him down.   
He didn’t hope for Kuroo to be in love with him too but he still caught himself longing for it to be true. _

_He wasn’t stupid, he knew the looks Kuroo gave him weren’t alike how he looked at his other friends, or the way he touched him sometimes crossed the line between platonic and romantic. Kenma didn’t hope for things to change, in fact, he likes to think that things were going great the way they are.  
And things were fine until they weren’t anymore. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY HEY HEY, HERE I COME AGAIN.  
> Sorry for the late update, school and work have been driving me crazy but I FINALLY finished this chapter!!!!  
> Writting this makes me feel so relaxed, it's like the story writes itself.   
> Now tell me, are you more exited for the Taekook or Kuroken Bits of the story? Love hearing from you guys!
> 
> Also a special shout out to my girls for reading it and supporting all my crazy ideias, love you ladies!
> 
> Comments and Kudos are always appreciated.
> 
> Find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/mooncatyoongi) .

**Author's Note:**

> Hello Hello Hello, guess who is back again?   
> I recently found a new obsession aka Kaikyuu (if you couldn't tell) and decided "oh, why not mix my two favorite things" and boom Taehyung's Journey Through Fanfiction - TJTF for short- was born.   
> I'm really enjoying writing this fic so I hope you enjoy reading it, too.   
> I will try to update it frequently, I pinky swear. 
> 
> Also a special shout out to my girls for reading it and supporting all my crazy ideias, love you ladies!
> 
> Comments and Kudos are always appreciated.
> 
> Find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/mooncatyoongi)


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